Beauty and Wisdom, The Last Generation
After
four years of photographing and interviewing women in beauty parlors
all over the country, the book of Beauty and Wisdom was released on Amazon.com at the end of this past year.
The reception has been wonderful and while I had hoped and
expected women to relate to it I have experienced a surprisingly
overwhelming response from men. I have given two talks so far this year
and it has touched me deeply that when it came time for the Q & A
section of those talks, it was mostly men asking questions and at the
end of those talks they approached me to convey their gratitude and were
pleased that someone was covering or rather, uncovering, this topic of
agelessness in a culture that concentrates mainly on its youth. In fact,
it was mostly men that bought the books!
I was introduced as the photojournalist who traveled around
the country photographing women at their weekly hair appointments. They
didn’t know what to expect but I sensed that they thought this was
going to be a whimsical talk about older women in salons and it reminded
me that it was just like that for me before I walked into the first
salon to photograph for the Beauty and Wisdom project. It was interesting to see the transformation which took place for me, also occurred for them.
I started the talks with a short movie I created for the presentation:
It presented many of the photos from the book and exhibit
set to the music of Joe Cocker’s “You are So Beautiful.” There were
chuckles at some of the photos, but I could tell these chuckles were
filled with love, respect and sensitivity. They weren’t making fun of
the photos, they were enjoying, as I did, being voyeurs into what was
considered a sacred ritual of sorts for many women of that generation
and realizing that it was anything but frivolity.
In most cases, these women attended the salon as a
necessity since at the time they could not reproduce their hairstyles by
themselves. In fact, many of the styles from the past are no longer
taught in salon schools. Attending their weekly appointments provided
connection and relaxation while beautifying. And, as one of the women
who shared at my talk noted, the salon was also a place where
‘underground’ information was shared at a time where certain
circumstances were to be kept secret or thought of as taboo. This was a
special time, women helping women at a time of need and sharing in
elation as well as sorrow.
This generation of women (and hairstyles) is fading. I
have lost three of my models in the last four years. Perhaps someday in
the not too distant future, these salons that cater to the patrons of
the once-a-week beauty parlor ritual, will be obsolete, but the wisdom
and paths that they paved for future generations will not be. I hope
they know how much they contributed and continue to contribute to so
many of us.
If I had to do it over again, I would spend more time
talking with the women about their lives, more in depth. I wanted to
honor their time at the salon as they set it aside and I didn’t want to
invade on their privacy. They agreed to let me take their photo and I
didn’t want to take up too much of their appointment asking them
questions. Some were more conversational than others, but they all had
beautiful and wise insight to share as well as the women who contributed
to the book in writing, also had beautiful and wise insights to share.
What I learned was that when I get the opportunity to speak
with an elder, to ask questions about their lives, I will. I once
heard that a good question you can ask your elder is, “what was one
difficult time of your life and what did you learn from it?” This is
where the wisdom gets juicy and the gap between generations lessens. We
start realizing that even though this person is older, they experience
their own trials and tribulations, just as a teen or twenty-something…or
fifty-something…. and they have the uncanny ability to offer some kind
of gem of wisdom that will remind us that we are all connected and
valuable, no matter what age. The gems of wisdom shared are invisible
reminders for difficult times. Our elders have more wisdom than most
and our culture would greatly benefit from giving them visibility and a
platform to hear their wise voices. I offer an alternative to how aging
and beauty is perceived and hope that you will take the cue from the
women in my project and choose to age fearlessly and gracefully, with no
regrets, all at the same time.
I’ll close with this quote from Debbie J. Johnson, contributing author to Beauty and Wisdom:
“I am so grateful to be reminded of the true beauty of age and wisdom and of a time-honored tradition that shaped our world more than we will probably ever know. It has reminded me that nature demonstrates beauty in so many ways. The firm, tight petals of the rose bud are indeed beautiful, but we all await the real beauty, as time unfolds, when the petals reveal the fullness of the bloom.”
Link to Article on Changing Aging, click here --> The Last Generation
